Dating a cancer guy

27-May-2015 01:00

When a person (male or female) realizes that only they themselves can be responsible for their emotions, actions, and reactions…they break the chain of seeking a sense of OK-ness externally.In the case where you dumped the guy, one common reason is that the guy doesn’t want to be alone, he doesn’t want to deal with his grief over the breakup and he doesn’t want to “deal with himself.” When he jumps into another relationship, he can get a dose of external female validation and derive a feeling of false sense of self-esteem and self-worth from her positive attention.It has its cost though and eventually devolves into a crippling neediness.To dispel the misconceptions, let’s take a look at some of the universal truths about guys and breakups – some of which may surprise you since they certainly are hidden from the surface. Simple enough to say, but I know plenty of women will talk about how some guy came off like an insensitive jackass after the relationship fell apart because of his actions post-breakup.The fact is: If a guy is profoundly obnoxious or terrible after a breakup, it is most often a testament to how rough the breakup was on him. MORE: 5 Things Every Girl Needs to Know About Guys Jerry Seinfeld once said that breaking up a relationship needs to be like taking off a Band-aid – One motion: OFF!

It’s not uncommon for people, men or women, to derive their sense of well-being, self-worth, and self-esteem from how other people treat them.

Recently the subject of guys and breakups came up and Sabrina and I went back and forth about what guys generally go through when they breakup.

It came down to be too much to put into the article I was writing, so we decided that I should throw it all into an installment of “Decoding Male Behavior.” To start, I wanted to write this article to dispel some of the misconceptions I’ve heard in regards to men and breakups.

All they experience is the continuous suffering and they want the suffering to end.

So as an easy way to “numb out” from what might seem like unending suffering, they jump into another relationship so they can continue feeding their sense of well-being.

It’s not uncommon for people, men or women, to derive their sense of well-being, self-worth, and self-esteem from how other people treat them.

Recently the subject of guys and breakups came up and Sabrina and I went back and forth about what guys generally go through when they breakup.

It came down to be too much to put into the article I was writing, so we decided that I should throw it all into an installment of “Decoding Male Behavior.” To start, I wanted to write this article to dispel some of the misconceptions I’ve heard in regards to men and breakups.

All they experience is the continuous suffering and they want the suffering to end.

So as an easy way to “numb out” from what might seem like unending suffering, they jump into another relationship so they can continue feeding their sense of well-being.

In the same regard, when a relationship ends, it is much much harder for a guy to go back and discuss and revisit and talk through and explain, etc. In fact, guys like to keep their emotional spectrum focused on a tight range of emotions – somewhere between amusement and contentedness.